It was Saturday 23rd September 2017, to be precise.
I had been lucky and had been in labour at home with a TENS machine for most of the day, and it was about 5pm when we realised things were progressing and it was probably time to go in to the hospital. I was dressed to impress, in a Jon Snow t-shirt, a pair of stripy pyjama bottoms and bejewelled flip flops. My husband loaded me into the car along with my mum and we started on our way. My waters broke whilst en route to the hospital, soaking my fashionable pair of pyjama trousers and my husband’s car seat in the process. Luckily, he had foreseen such a possibility, and had coated the passenger seat in clingfilm prior to departure!
We arrived at the hospital and my mum helped me out of the car at the entrance so my husband could go and find a parking space. The contractions were coming strong and frequently now and I was gripped by one just as I was walking through the automatic doors. My mum spied a wheelchair nearby and suggested I get into it, and I promptly exclaimed ‘I’M NOT GETTING IN THAT!’ just as the automatic doors closed, sandwiching me between them. Realising I looked somewhat ridiculous trapped between the doors with soaked trousers, I eventually consented to sitting in the chair, periodically yelling at my mum to stop pushing it whenever a contraction came (I don’t know why but the motion seemed to make it worse).
After deafening a few unsuspecting fellow lift passengers with intermittent yelling through contractions, we reached the floor on which labour ward was located. Just as we were about to enter the ward, a sudden contraction hit and it must have panicked a passing porter because the next thing I knew he emerged from labour ward accompanied by a midwife who was holding a delivery pack. By this time, the contraction was over and I looked at them, confused, wondering what all the fuss was about. They explained they thought I was about to deliver in the corridor and I simply replied ‘I should be so lucky! I don’t think I’m quite there yet!’
I was taken to an assessment bay, and by this point, trying to keep still for long enough to be examined was somewhat of a challenge. I was apologising incessantly because I realised that me writhing around wasn’t helpful for the staff trying to assess my cervix. I could have kissed the midwife when she told me I was 8cm dilated and was going to be transferred straight to delivery suite. When you have been at home you have no real idea of how far things have got, and so for all you know you could be in agony and only be 2cm along!
Once on delivery suite the pains were frequent and severe. I climbed on to the bed, on all fours, my feet at the head end and my head at the foot end. This was me attempting to adopt a position I had read about in an article about preventing serious tears in labour- they said all fours or on your side was supposed to be superior to being on your back. The midwife advised me that the bed may tip up if I stayed like that so, following some laughter from my husband and mum at the thought of me ending up on the floor with the hospital bed on top of me, I turned round, adopting a position with my arms flopped over the top of the bed’s elevated head. At this point I realised that no one is joking when they say childbirth is painful, and there was a voice inside my head that said ‘I can’t do it.’ I quickly realised, however, that I didn’t really have much choice in the matter, and that the baby was going to have to come out one way or another, and sooner rather than later! I had some serious words with myself in my head and essentially told myself that I had to be able to carry on no matter how hard it seemed. After rapidly feeling extremely intoxicated on the gas and air (which is great by the way), the pushing started. It was pretty exhausting and I often wondered if I was getting anywhere. After a few hours (it seemed like forever), at 20:51, my son Henry was born.
So many people seem to say that they are overwhelmed with emotion and love as soon as they set eyes on their baby. However, I have to be honest, I was too exhausted to contemplate crying and I basically just looked at my son and was like ‘oh, there’s the baby.’ My husband took a picture of me attempting to smile, whilst trying not to grimace because everything was hurting (because I found I still had quite a bit of pain until the placenta had been delivered). I had sustained a small second degree tear and required some stitches, and whilst this was being done I had instructed my husband to fetch me a large hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows. All I knew was that I needed hydration and sugar.
After the stitching had been done (and believe me, having this done is nothing compared to giving birth!), I was told to have a bath. Now I’m not joking, this looked like a scene from some sort of horror movie. I got in having left a trail of blood behind me, and the bath water swiftly turned a deep shade of red. My husband looked on, horrified.
A lot of people ask what childbirth is like. In my experience, the first bit, which for me lasted roughly 12 hours, was like regular cramps. These gradually get longer and more intense and then you reach a transition stage where I found the pain very intense, so much so that I could barely sit still. Then the pushing starts, and basically it is an overwhelming desire to push, you cannot fight it. This stage was very tiring, and the only way I can describe it is like your whole abdomen contracting downwards trying to expel the baby! So, to be totally honest, it is pretty unpleasant, but also completely worth it in the end when you get the baby. It is something you soon forget, and I went and did it again just over a year later when I had my second son.
Personally, I found the TENS machine was excellent during labour and I could not recommend it highly enough. There are lots of options for pain relief in labour, but the TENS machine is obviously drug free, and there is not much to lose if you try it- if it doesn’t work for you then you can always get something else, and if it does then it can allow you to avoid stronger drugs if that’s what you may prefer. I learned about TENS machines from a midwife at my work (I should probably mention that I am an anaesthetist). I used the TENS machine for both of my labours along with gas and air in the latter stages. I have recommended TENS machines to all of my friends who have gone through childbirth since I had my first son and many of them have had good things to say about them.
Below you can see the picture of me grimacing just after Henry was born. It is times like those when you thank your lucky stars you are not royal and you don’t have to go through all that and then greet a bunch of news reporters only hours later! I don’t think I would have made the front pages!
